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| Born on June 5, 2016 at 6:42 am. 7 lbs, 14 oz, 20.5 in. |
"For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made." Psalm 139:13-14
The Memory
They say these special hormones make women forget the pain of childbirth in order for them to be willing to continue to procreate. Josh was worried about these hormones. You see, we've always said we want (and are still planning) to foster to adopt children. Josh was fine adopting ALL of our children. I've always said birth is a miracle, and I wanted to experience pregnancy and childbirth, in addition to adopting. Josh said he'd ask me every day after giving birth to see when the hormones kick in, because he didn't believe I could actually forget the details of that insane experience. Well, he didn't ask me every day, but somewhere around one month after Evie's arrival, I realized they must have kicked in. I've already forgotten how much it hurt. There's something about holding that precious little one in your arms that makes you realize the nine months of discomfort and few hours of excruciating pain were completely worth it.
While I've tried to refrain from oversharing the really nitty gritty details of birth, I have written a lot. I know it's long. I don't expect everyone to read this whole thing. It's really more for my sake. I want to have this incredible experience documented somewhere before I forget anything else.
The Name: Evangeline (Evie) Clare Cook
Evangeline - Greek for "good news." We pray that Evie's life will tell others about the good news of Christ's love.
We wanted a Biblical first name, but there are a lot less girl names than boy names in the Bible. Finding one we both agreed on was challenging. Deciding a name is hard! We liked Evangeline because it was biblically based. Though not technically French, it is also a name claimed by the Cajuns because of a poem written by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, so it pays tribute to her birthplace. Also, shortly after we found the name Evangeline and discussed it as a possibility, I had the only dream I ever had about Baby Cook while pregnant. I told Josh the next day that I'd dreamed we had a girl named Evangeline and we called her Evie. We didn't take the dream to really mean anything and kept looking and discussing other names. It was still probably another month before we determined for sure that would be our girl name.
Clare - named after Clare of Assisi. She was an Italian saint and one of the first followers of Francis of Assisi. While we are not Catholic, we are great admirers of Francis of Assisi. Both Francis and Clare gave up an aristocratic life of wealth and comfort to follow God and tell others about Him. When we were in Italy last summer we went to Assisi and were able to see the basilicas of both Francis and Clare.
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| Basilica of Saint Clare in Assisi, Italy |
The Birth Story
Baby Cook was due Thursday, June 2nd. That day came and went with no sign of baby. I woke up having minor contractions around 7:00 Saturday morning, June 4th. I had some Braxton Hicks earlier in the week and was hesitant to believe this was the real deal. We walked around the neighborhood, watched Netflix, and talked with friends and family on the phone while we monitored the contractions all day. They were slowly getting stronger and closer together as the day went along. Josh made me walk up and down our block while he went to get some Vietnamese food for dinner. I stuck with a smoothie because by that time I was thinking this was it!
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| Headed to the hospital! |
We waited until contractions were 4-5 minutes apart for an hour, and we left for the hospital around 9:15 pm. In true New Orleans fashion, it started pouring rain right as it was time for us to go. We arrived at the hospital, left our bag in the car, and made our way to Labor and Delivery. They put us in a Triage room where they monitored Baby Cook's heart rate. At that point, I was only 2 cm dilated. So disappointing. We had to wait in the room another 2 hours until they would check me again for any progress before they would check me into Labor and Delivery. Josh and I only had our phones with us, so we listened to one of the few books we already had downloaded on Audible,"The Hobbit," to pass the time. (Our poor child is destined to be a nerd.)
After 2 hours, I was still only 2 cm dilated. Because I wasn't progressing, the doctor on duty wanted to send me home. NOOOOOOOO!! We were so confused about when to come back to the hospital. We were monitoring on my phone, and I was having contractions every 3-4 minutes at this point. I was ready for an epidural soon, and they were ready for me to leave! Josh suggested we just go sit in the parking lot rather than go all the way back home and not know when to return. The doctor told me to go home, eat a good meal, get some rest, and she was sure I'd be back again to have this baby the next day. [What?!?! Um, am I supposed to sleep the two minutes in between contractions?? Even for a girl with a sleeping disorder, that's not going to happen.]
Meanwhile, we'd given the go-ahead to both sets of parents who were making their way from Atlanta to New Orleans. Nurse Practitioner Joy/Mimi was upset at the thought of them sending me home. She thought this was it, and I'd wanted her to be in the room with me, so she and Dad kept driving and arrived in New Orleans around 2:00 am. The Cooks hadn't been able to leave until later, so they stopped in Alabama and got a hotel room.
Before I went home, the doctor wanted to monitor the baby's heart rate for 20 minutes. Well, between me having contractions and the baby moving all around, that was much easier said than done. The nurse kept adjusting the heart rate monitor band around my belly, but it took over an hour to get 20 continuous minutes of monitoring. It was around 1:00 am. By that point, contractions were coming every 2-3 minutes and were stronger and more painful. The doctor didn't feel comfortable having me leave, so I was moved to Labor and Delivery. Hooray!
They checked me in to L&D around 2:00 am. The benefit of going into labor over the weekend means that no one is there and you get all of the nurses' attention. :) We had two wonderful nurses, Julia and Emma, who were so sweet and caring. Right away they asked me if I wanted an epidural. I'd been pretty sure that I would get one. Josh, though not the one actually "pulling a baby doll through a keyhole," really wanted me to try and go naturally. By that point, it was 2:00 am Sunday; I'd been contracting since 7:00 am Saturday, and we were both tired. "Yes, I want an epidural" was my immediate answer, and Josh agreed. The nurses started my IV and called for the anesthesiologist.
The anesthesiologist came right away (again, the perks of 2:00 am on the weekend). As he was giving his shpeel about how the epidural could kill you or leave you paralyzed (and yet at that point in time you really it's a risk you are more than willing to take!), we hear a voice scream down the hall "Ohhhhh myyyy gaaaaaawd!" followed by expletives. A second later, the anesthesiologist's phone rang. "Uh huh, 10 centimeters right now? I think it's too late, but I'll come." He turned to us and said, "I'm so sorry, but I have to go see about another patient. Give me 5 minutes and I'll be right back." I knew that I was no where near the pain level of the screaming woman down the hall and agreed that he needed to go. About 15 minutes passed and by that point I was ready for him to return . . . though it should be noted that I never got as bad as that poor lady.
The anesthesiologist returned and Josh left the room to get the bag out of the car. The scariest part of the epidural was the fact that I was contracting as they were giving it to me, something I had not really thought through. It was hard to hold perfectly still while your body is tightening in pain. But all of a sudden, it was over. The nurse watched a contraction pass on the monitor and asked, "Did you feel that?" "Feel what?" I responded. Epidural success!!
Fun side note - our nurses were very excited about us not knowing the gender. They said it was rare for parents to wait these days, and if Baby Cook didn't come until after their shift was over at 7:00 am, they would check back with us to find out the gender when they came back on duty the next night. :) They did ask us if we had to predict the gender, what we thought. I'd had no real "motherly instincts" my whole pregnancy. I told them I didn't want to guess a sex and then be wrong. That would make me look like a bad mom, or at least that I was disappointed about the gender . . . and of course I wouldn't be disappointed either way! They said they wouldn't tell anyone, but that we should at least make a guess. Josh and I looked at each other and both said, "Girl."
They also asked if I was okay with having the lowest dose of pitocin. While I wasn't expecting pitocin since I wasn't technically being induced, I was fine with it because, once again, by that point, I just wanted Baby Cook out as soon as possible! The nurses got me all hooked up and then turned out the lights and left us alone so we could "try and get some sleep." I think I did actually sleep for about an hour, though poor Josh says he never slept. At 4:00 am I woke up because I was pretty sure my water broke. We buzzed for the nurses and sure enough, it had. At that point I was at 4 centimeters dilated.
After that, I didn't do much sleeping either. Without going into too much detail, I was in the transition stage and could feel a LOT of pressure. Having never done this before, I didn't realize until talking with other people afterward, my epidural was either wearing off or was just a light epidural, because I was very aware of what was happening, and I could tell baby was coming. I was glad to have the epidural because it allowed my body to relax, and the pitocin worked to get things moving.
At 6:15 am, the resident on duty came to check on me. He informed me that I was 10 centimeters dilated and had me do two practice pushes. "Woah, woah, woah," he called out, "No more pushing! You will have no problems delivering that baby." He said that they were going to call my OBGYN and give her time to get to the hospital. We would plan to begin pushing at 7:30 am. [Please note, baby is about to come out with my practice pushes, BUT I'm supposed to wait over an hour to push.] As he was about to leave he said, "If you feel like you need to push . . . don't. We really want you to wait. But if you feel like you can't help it and absolutely have to, buzz for your nurses and let them know."
We called our parents to let them know. Josh's parents were already on the road from Alabama. While telling my mom, I had to hand the phone to Josh because I was contracting and couldn't talk. [Another hint that maybe baby would arrive sooner than 7:30.] My parents and brother Philip began getting ready at their hotel to be at the hospital by 7:30.
After the resident left, I was in more pain and feeling more and more like I needed to push. But having never done this before, I wasn't really sure what to expect. By 6:30, a mere 15 minutes after the resident had left, I couldn't keep from pushing any more. I had Josh buzz the nurses and before I knew it, the room was full of people! Baby Cook was coming! The resident (I wish I knew his name) was putting all his delivery gear on. Josh said that the nurses would walk by and look and stick out their hand like they were trying to keep baby from coming out before they were ready!
"Ok, before we get started, I need to know, how are we doing the gender reveal?" the resident asked. Josh and I were both confused. Isn't the baby being born the gender reveal "Like, is Mom announcing the gender, is Dad announcing it, or am I just holding baby up Lion King style?" he clarified. "Oh," Josh and I laughed, looked at each other, and then he said, "Let's Lion King it." At that point, I didn't care who said what!
I couldn't really help but start to push. I didn't realize how quickly everything was happening until I looked at Josh's face. He'd been worried all along that he wouldn't be able to stomach being in the delivery room. Hence the reason my mom, the pediatric nurse practitioner, was supposed to be in there too. I told him that as the father of this child, he had to be in the delivery room, but he could stay at my head and hold my hand. What I didn't take into account was the fact that I'm only 5'3", and with my legs up, that put Josh only a few feet away from the action. But he handled it like a pro! [Later, he even cut the umbilical cord.]
The resident told me to push; Josh told me to take deep breaths. I say it was 7-8 real pushes. Josh says it was more like 2 or 3. In the exact moment that she was being born, I thought, "I will NEVER do this again!" But then the baby was out, and, true to his word, the resident held the baby up Lion King style with the bright delivery lights focused on her. "It's a girl!" he said. Then, as I was still a little shocked the baby was actually out and it was all over so fast, he asked me, "What is it, Mama?" "It's a girl!" I said in a daze. "She has hair," I added. [It should be noted that I was bald until I was two, so I was basically just a big head with big blue eyes toddling around. Josh, on the other hand, was a long, lanky baby. So we'd been worried we were going to have a bald lollipop of a child with a huge head and long skinny body.] "And she's kinda cute," Josh said. I know we sounded like the worst parents in the world with the lowest expectations possible for our child, but we had prepared ourselves for the worst and were both pleasantly surprised. They put her onto my chest, and feeling her little head nuzzling around was one of the most amazing things. The moving thing that had just been the idea of a baby inside of me was all of a sudden outside and very much a little person.
All of this took place at 6:42 am.
Then I was in pain as they all began working on everything else that goes on after delivery, and by that point I could feel what seemed like everything. I was a little distracted while Josh was staring at her mesmerized and having sweet first memories. She really was so incredibly beautiful. After skin-to-skin time and feeding her for the first time, they took her measurements. 7 pounds, 14 ounces, 20.5 inches long.
Josh asked me later if I was disappointed my doctor didn't make it in time (more likely, didn't even make it out of bed). I was not at all because I could not have not pushed for another 45 minutes. My mom had texted my brothers Michael and Matthew to inform them that I was going to start pushing at 7:30, but that "it could be hours before the baby arrives." Everything was finished and our nurses were leaving our room at 7:15. We apologized because our crazy spontaneous delivery caused them to stay late, but they were glad they were there for the big gender reveal. And they were super excited that we'd correctly predicted that Baby Cook would be a girl. :)
When my family arrived in the waiting room, they were confused to see Josh walk out, wondering why he was not in the delivery room encouraging me to push. He announced that they had a grandDAUGHTER. They were shocked she had come so soon. Evie was a quick delivery. We enjoyed our hour of skin-to-skin. She nursed right away. They bathed her. Josh held her. And then the family came in to see her. There were tears. Josh's parents showed up a little while later and there were more tears.
Not knowing the gender was a little annoying towards the very end of pregnancy. It helped that we weren't doing a full out nursery in our shotgun apartment, so I didn't have to know the gender as much. My dad had worn a pink shirt on the drive down to represent team girl. Almost everyone else said I was carrying straight out and only in my belly, so it was a boy. Josh had wanted a girl all along. I warned him that she would have him wrapped around her little finger from the moment she was born, and I was right. Baby Cook is a GIRL and she is perfect!
The Pictures
